You know when I'm down to just my socks it's time for business that's why they call it business socks

If you havent read Tinglez submission on this weekend, read it first here.

Saturday. Business time.

Since Friday was a relatively early evening, our affairs began somewhat earlier than the norm. The entire squad was ready to drop at a moments notice. The plan was to get downtown, acquire transportation, and spend some bills.

With winter setting in, and my teammates and I just being lazy, the decision that free bussing to downtown is a good option. I check the schedule. *Fuck!* Not that I have a fear of busses, but as it turns out, the ‘next bus’ is in about 2 or 3 minutes; usually not enough time. I inform Lmack & Tinglez that our ETA is 30 minutes, and begin to chill. Though intense interrogation, Lmack discovers that there is a bus within the next ‘now,’ and pushes on, like any true Spartan. We put the tactic to a vote, and it passes.

Code red! We have to move, and it needs to be done 10 minutes ago. We rush like a banshee out of the T & R, gathering the required equipment and suiting up in our MJOLNIR armor (that would be jackets and scarves for you non-Halo fans). We bust out of our Barracks and make a made dash to the nearest bus terminal. As we run up the hill, we see some civilians standing there. *Whew* Either all is well, or they suck for giving us all hope, and we all missed it. We move swiftly across the roadway and no more than 2 minutes pass and our transport appears over the horizon.

We board and rest, we drop in about 10 minutes, at the “high school down the street.” We walk down to King St. and check out some merchandise at a local technology shop, before continuing with the mission.

Things are looking good. The weekend has been cheerful thus far, looked at some nifty gadgets, and just barely made it to the bus. We walked down King & crossed University Ave, when we were joking about catching a bus. Three steps later a bus screeches to a halt 15 feet in front of us.

For those of you wondering; no there is no God, other people are just getting on and off.

As squad leader, I give the order to triple time it and take off running to catch the transport. I and my teammates make the dash with no troubles at all, and in fact had to wait to get on. As useless at running was, it did fortify our chances of getting a ride.

Four minutes later we get off the bus and are now downtown Waterloo. Before grabbing the car from my sisters place, we make a stop in at a store Tinglez wanted to go to called “Delirium.” It’s a pretty cool store, but a little over priced. They carry punk/Goth clothing, mainly for girls. Nothing was purchased but there were 2 notable points:

-Devil Duck bath mat

-An extended rainbow or semi-permanent hair colouring, including purple

We headed back towards the car, while making a stop along the way at a comic book store. We browsed the shelves, and I left with a copy of “Halo Uprising,” and interesting mini story (1 out of 4) the fills in the gaps between Halo 2 & 3.

We make it to the car & head to the mall. But! Tinglez requires coffee, so we quickly pull into Tim Horton’s Drive through. I pay for her beverage and wait. No drink in my hand. I notice people in the back finishing other orders and still nothing for me. After what feels like 2 or 3 minutes of nothing, the super happy Timmy’s girl pops her head out the window and asks “What are you waiting for?” as though I enjoy burning gasoline, doing dickall in the drive though holding other people up.

“A coffee” I reply as nice as possible.

“Oh…” she replies with a look on her face that would make a deer caught in headlights look seem like Albert Einstein.

She the looks beside the window, sees a coffee & hands it to me. Frustrated, I take it & drive off as we discuss the air headedness of this woman. According to Lmack, I should have told her I was waiting for my order in an angry, almost outraged tone. Tinglez called her a “pirate skank.’ It was all good commentary.

Once at the mall, shopping begins. We go into Winners looking for shoes for myself, and maybe Tinglez. Everything in my size sucks hair balls, so I say fuck it. Were about to leave when we happen to notice a pair of size 9 (Lmacks foot size) Heelies, marked down to under $40. We investigate further to find they have no wheels.

Lmack really wants these cheap, awesome shoes. Some quick improvising from Tinglez, and wheels magically appear from another pair of shoes. After the purchase is lunch. Chinese for Tinglez, two mozza burgers for Lmack and myself. I get a side of O rings and couldn’t be happier or fuller.

We cruise the mall more, looking for protective footwear for Tinglez, and (after a lot of browsing and poor Wolfgang treating is wound from lunch) find a nice pair in the Boathouse. Also note that shoelaces are on sale, 3 for $15. It takes my squad mates 20 minutes, but they convince me to also get laces, even though I didn’t get new shoes.

After the mall, we return our drop ship at my sisters residence and bus it back to Tinglez place to pick up a blanket for Lmack, so he doesn’t have to sleep in my housecoat. We’re about to walk to the next bus when Tinglez roommate wants to procrastinate & gives us a ride back to HQ. Score, it seems as though luck is our friend today.

Once back, the shoelace party begins. Interested lace patterns & laces are tried out until we are all satisfied with our footwear. Some video games are played (I think) before breaking out the booze.

The drinking starts and I prepared a surprise for my guests. Three gummy worms soaking in vodka, peach schnapps, and tequila awaited us in my firdge. After a drink, Tinglez is the first to try a worm (not by choice, mind you). She puts it in her mouth, and everything seems ok so far. The taste of the tequila sets in and she gags. She stays string and tries 2 more times, but gives up before throwing up. Next up is Lmack. He takes it like a man, although has difficulty chewing it. My turn. It went fine for me as well, although I couldn’t sink my teeth into it to save my life. I finally show the worm who’s boss & begin to put him away, however by now the tequila has warmed up & becomes bitter in my mouth. Next up is the juices the worms were soaking in. Tinglez opted out but after the worm we didn’t blame her. The juice went down like a 2 cent whore. Just tasted like gummy vodka, what more could we want?

In-between vanilla vodka shots, were some disturbing videos, seen below. WARNING: If you have a weak stomach, or a strong one for that matter, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

2 Girls 1 Cup

BME Pain Olympics

Next on the menu was a berry flavoured liquor I got from my aunt from Austria. We all shot; god aweful. We then mixed with a kiwi lime juice. Couldn’t taste it. We finished it off, had another shot, & contacted Binks. We was out downtown with a couple of girls. We arrange to meet them at Starbucks & continue to Phil’s for drunkfest.

We cab it downtown & find our objective. Lmack impression of his female friends isn’t a highly rated one, and Tinglez knows one of them as the Fishnet Girls from her class. We part ways as the girls can’t drink because of work tomorrow, and walk to Phil’s.

Tinglez nor Lmack have been before. This is my home away form the bottle in the Loo. I proudly escort my team down the stairs past cover, coat check & to the bar. The place isn’t too busy just yet. I am shock to discover that drink have gone up in price from $1.75 to $2.25, but one thing remains: Drunk happens.

We get some drinks and end up meeting Binks female friends there anyway. Soon after we grab a couch as the place begins to fill, and actually get waited on. The booze is flowing, people are mingling, and all is merry. That is until, Wolfgang decides to spice up the night with something very different, and it put a devastating twist onto the mission…

To be continued...